Today, U.N. scientists announced that they were “90% certain” that humans are responsible for current global warming trends. But contrary to popular belief, the fact that humans are causing global warming is not necessarily a bad thing. For example, the NYT reports that, in addition to submerging large cities, creating catastrophic hurricanes and droughts, spreading malaria and killing off endangered species, global warming could possibly bring “some benefits to health such as fewer deaths from cold.” Suck an (2 or 3 degree warmer) Inuit dick, Al Gore. Here are graphics prepared by scientists that present three vastly different pictures of the Warmer World of Tomorrow:

This is Scenario B1, also called “the one where the whole world gets a lot redder and darker, and all the green splotches disappear from the ocean.” If scenario B1 is the right scenario, here’s hoping red stands for video arcade density.

This is Scenario A1B, also known as “endless summer.” I sure hope that scenario A1B is the right scenario.

Let’s not talk about Scenario A2.  Can’t stand Kurt Russell.